#20 Sound

What happens when you’re deaf in one ear?

You go around the person you’re walking with, to their right side where you can hear them because you don’t want to inconvenience them. You awkwardly ask the friend who’s sitting in the corner if you could swap seats so you can hear the conversations without asking them to repeat too often. Your first instinct when you hear a loud bang is to look to your left because you have no sense of sound localisation. You feel guilty for being considered a special needs person when you can go about daily life like a normal person, despite minor inconveniences.

But also because you’re so aware of the silence on one side, you appreciate the sounds that you do hear; the shuffling the papers and the clickety-clack of the keyboard in an otherwise empty library; the bubbling of hot water and the crackle and crunch when you tear open the packet of instant noodles in the dead of night; and the slow, even breathing of your partner when they’re asleep.

*****

This is probably the first time I've openly written about my ear. I have type III Microtia in my right ear, which is a genetic disorder resulting in the underdevelopment of an ear and loss of an eardrum. In other words, I'm deaf in one ear.