tinyletter #8 | Beginnings and Endings

Throughout September, I’ve had a mix of conversations with many different friends and acquaintances: A “congratulations” is often followed up with an “I’m sorry.” For those who don’t know, my grandmother passed away on the morning of the Mid-Autumn Festival, the same day that my first gallery solo exhibition opened to the public and that was the general theme of what happened in the last four weeks; having a vague comprehension that career-wise, things are going well, while at the same time, feeling numb and empty, that everything is wrong.

We knew things were bad when the hospital offered us compassionate visit rights, nights after she was admitted in. I was able to see her hours before she left us. She held my hand, squeezed it, and weakly whispered “Are you cold?” But she could hear me say no; “You’re cold, and I’m cold, whatever are we going to do?” Grandma passed in her sleep the next morning.

Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve been trying to process everything that had happened. Been cleaning out her things with my mum and aunt, sat in on family meetings, and even helped to choose and photoshop her headshot at her funeral. But it’s like the memory resets after each stage, each ritual. We went out to lunch after a meeting about her funeral, and for a moment, I was thinking of what take-out to get grandma, something we did without thinking every day before. It takes a second to remember that she’s not here anymore.

Mum said that I shouldn’t talk about Grandma to other people anymore, that it’s enough to remember her within the family. I get that, so instead I’m painting portraits of Grandma, writing down the stories she told me about her life that I wasn’t a part of, writing down the memories I do have of her, and hope that slowly these bits and pieces can capture the multi-faceted badass that my grandma was.

 

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Despite losing my Grandma, September brought the opening of my first gallery solo exhibition, “Have A Rice Day” as well as the final production of the Gwai Lenormand.

Though I missed the opening, we had a VIP lunch and preview of the exhibition with the gallery’s clients. The lunch, catered by the gallery, featured 8 dishes that my grandma, mum and aunt made – subsequently, I also captured those dishes in paintings. The exhibition featured 24 paintings I did in a span of 7 weeks and it was amazing to see them all hanging on walls, filling up a room.

As a way to make up for missing out on the exhibition for the last few weeks, I wrote some anecdotes about the quartet of acrylic on canvas paintings that each represented a member of my family: My Grandma, Mum, my aunt, and me.

The Gwai Lenormand is also all done after months of designing and working on the guidebook. Despite a typo, I’m really proud of how polished the deck looks and I am already using it for monthly readings. The Gwai Lenormand, despite my wishes of it being a kinder deck, seemed to embody a rebellious spirit and needs a little coaxing before using. I'm also in process of updating the monthly tarot readings; half are done already. 

Now that my grandma's funeral is done, I will be back to packing and sending decks and other things to you all; thank you for always being patient with me.
 

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The new beginning part of September/October is that I have new projects on my agenda again, and new skills I want to acquire. I'm also putting myself on a strict regimen to be healthier, and will finally use the rest of the quarter to tackle projects I've put off for years. 

One of which will be a transition from tinyletter to a more coherent mailing list system -- why split into several platforms when I can host everything on the same platform as my website? So there might be a chance you'll see a new revamped version of a monthly newsletter (note: I'm also trying to figure out how I want to use this mailing list, it's honestly acting a little bit like a blog for me right now and I'm not sure everyone wants to read this much each month lol)
 

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Upcoming Happenings:

9 October 2022 (Saturday, 1-7 pm) – Tarot Reading at Current Plans 
The prices and variety/format of readings I'm offering is a one-time-only special for this event, so don't miss out if you're in the area :) Also, it's a full moon, so it's guaranteed to be a super-charged reading!

15 October 2022 (Saturday, 11-6 pm) – Closing of “Have A Rice Day” and exhibition tour with me and Ruby Weatherall
The exhibition tour will be in English and held at 3 pm that day

19 - 21 October 2022 -- 2022 Asia Art Archive Annual Fundraiser Preview
A painting of mine from last year is donated to this year's fundraiser and will be on view at Christie's between the 19th to 21st. 
 

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Anyway, I hope you’ve had a good September and an even better October. Happy Halloween / Samhain, friends.

Love,
Charlotte